What I want... really, really badly

Okay, so I've got two major wishes here. And I'll take either one gladly.

First up- being a kid again. I know- I'm not quite an old one, or even middle aged (or even close to it), but I want to be five again all the same. How awesome is the age of five? When school was fun, there was a new letter and song about that letter added to the alphabet string every week, when it was exciting to be able to read a few simple sentences, when kindergarten was a half day and you didn't want to leave school. Kickball games in the neighborhood every other night, trading off with ghost in a graveyard and a weekly man-hunt game. When parents would have their own "summoning call" to make their kids come running home for a snack and bedtime. When the doorbell ringing always meant that my two best friends were here to ask me if I wanted to play. *sigh*

I started to lose math when they started using letters instead of numbers, I dread going to school and wish to leave early if only (if ONLY) I could get up the nerve to skip out, and books that I want to read versus dry old English class books written by dead white guys are a rare treat. The doorbell only rings when the army send out a guy to ask my older brother if he would please take a look at the pamphlet about the Armed Forces or whatever, those two best friends are people I barely even see, much less talk to. I just took the SATs and am looking at colleges I know I won't go to unless I go to, I take tests, prognostics, REGENTS, APs in May, finals, midterms, DBQs, and the NMSQT. It's tiring. Not that life is all bad now (certainly not) but I don't want to get any older.

I mean, if I'm a good girl in life and I go to heaven, I will be five and in my neighborhood again. That is, if I can place an order like that. I don't know how it'll work, but if God can fix me up with that, I would be tha happiest (angel?) in heaven.

Second on my list (though it should be first, as it is just a smidge more likely than the first), is love. I want to fall in love so much, and I know that sounds school-girlish (I am) and naive and innocent (again, I am) and all that- but I do. Yes, I've gotten the memo that it hurts a hell of a lot sometimes, and that it doesn't always work out the way people plan it to... "It is far better to love and lose than never to love at all." Isn't that a famous quote? And certainly I should imagine that famous quotes are grounded with fact and expirience, no? I want to learn about love, for good or for ill. I can only imagine what I could write with such first hand knowledge. But I'm young yet, so I also understand that I'm not ready for what I'm asking here.

What brought this peice to my list was the book I finished last night. I live for the love scenes- when they awkwardly and haltingly confess their feelings for each other, blushing and stuttering. Sometimes they just straight out dive in for a kiss when he/she isn't expecting it. Ah, it's so nice. So are happily ever afters. And I will immediatly stop talking about this because I just re-read what I've been typing and I have realized how stupid and pathetic I sound... damn.

Anyways, these are my two wishes. The first wish is the one that I want more (at this moment in time at least). Think about it- would you like to be five again? You already know my answer is an overly loud and enthusiastic YEEEEEEEES!